跟著落黎兩日，李太朝朝用口含醒我，佢嘅早餐，梗係我啲--白粥啦，我就再先出街同佢食嘢，送佢返工，仔女就真係佢姑仔搞掂哂，放工就過姑仔屋企食飯見吓啲細路，跟著就自己返黎同我荒淫無度。
我將上次救佢老公同可儀一事講咗比佢聼，依家佢知可儀同我有路，唔多唔少做多啲向我爭寵，其實佢哋兩個各有所長，我兩個都鐘意，以往李太都好「肯做」，依家咪連月經期都比我玩埋，仲扮埋未經人道嘅處女新娘比我洞房開苞，又叫撚埋我做「老公」，一邊比我屌，一邊大聲喊屌得佢好舒服，咁嘅女人，去邊度搵吖。
呢排嗰市升到咁高，啱啱好可以出噤啲貨吐現去冚條貴利數，好快到星期四，聽日李生就返，抓完條貴利數後唔知幾時先又有得過去李宅玩，需然李太都會過黎比我屌，但就冇得朝朝比人含醒咁過癮。
今日行開XX國際學校嗰頭，見到啲條街好多著咗Racheal上次同樣校裙嘅o靚妹，我就索性入到左近快餐店整杯凍啡睇吓女。（「風雨故人來」間「天下第一店」，馬如雲由細浦大，「情意結」地方）
點知真係咁啱線，直頭好似王晶啲戲都冇咁啱，屌.....咪係囉，Racheal 喎，哈，仲有乜嘢可以正過响呢頭撞到呢位咁有性格特質嘅竹升妹吖？
咪竹升妹加個金髮鬼妹仔同學囉，屌，真係開心到合唔撚埋口啦，不過當然呢啲只係心裏面，外表更係要保持夠cool啦。
男人就係咁，見到靚女就開心，依家人哋有得比你屌咩？咁開心做乜撚嘢，又好似路邊有靚女爆車呔，啲友仔就飛撲埋去幫人換呔，依家換完呔係咪就有西屌先，唔係吖嘛，人哋咪至多講聲「多謝」就係咁先啦，拜拜。但啲契弟就係咁中埋去，仲口硬話「幫吓人吖嘛」，我屌，如果係件豬扒睇吓啲契弟幫唔幫，呢啲就係男人嘅無奈，唉。
兩個o靚妹就排响我前面，我好老土咁同Racheal打招呼，不過佢好似唔多想應我咁，仍然同佢鬼妹仔同學傾計，當我冇到。
鬼妹仔就問Racheal，”Do you know this guy?"
Racheal 就答，”Kinda，but not really。”
屌，鬼咩，人哋萬七理由唔撚鳩想理你啦：
1）你老餅，大人廿年有多。
2）你老土，都唔係in人哋啲嘢。
3）你係佢新媽咪個friend，人哋唔撚老禮新媽咪嘅。
4）你條撚樣講中文，人哋鐘意講英文嘅。
5）同你真係唔係好熟，同你撘過一次lift，仲係冇燈响張床墊另一邊。
6）你個樣好撚咸濕，露撚晒出黎啦。
就咁都數幾樣，係咪啋我都有味吖，不過.....
話咗我賤男唔係第一日出黎玩，又點會就咁比條o靚妹打沉吖，我以男人見到靚女為精神，為港人與外來文化溝通而爭光，一於已己之長，攻彼之弱，以我嘅錢，去攻人性嘅貪，以我嘅經驗老練，去攻破佢嘅年幼無知。
當時撞啱放學好忙，連條中坑經理都落埋塲收銀，我等佢哋叫完晒嘢，我响後面同中坑經理就咁一句，
”我幫佢哋比埋吖，識架。”
屌，中坑經理梗知乜撚嘢料啦，好識做，仲成機問啲女仲有乜嘢要，玩大張單，賣多啲，屌佢老味吖。
兩條女即時回頭向我一望，鬼妹唔識聽中文，望完我後又望Racheal，好快咁互相細細聲吱吱沉沉，只聽到鬼妹最後一句，
”Why not？”
跟著咪原本兩杯氣水，改為又貴又唔撚抵飲嘅珍珠奶茶囉，屌，妹妹仔，想食珠之嘛，叔叔呢度有兩粒，一人一粒唔之爭，食得叻嘅，仲獎埋椰汁紀廉。
嘻，不過冇所謂，肯接招就得，林行時，Racheal 都起碼用中文講咗句，
”多謝 la”，
鬼妹反應就香甜好多，見牙唔見眼嘅”Thank you！”差唔多好似想嘴我一啖咁，所以有時唔係話番自己中國人，禮貌呢家嘢，真係要學習學習。
呢個照面我可以睇清楚條鬼妹仔，一般黎講，鬼妹比人感覺係狂，野，大膽，熱情奔放，無乜所謂，好容易比個西人屌。
唉，醒目啲啦，唔好咁易比人洗腦啦，鬼妹都有好多種架，好似好多蘇聯鬼婆，成日顧著飲vodka飲到啲皮膚比酒性搞到粗晒，又有啲鬼婆高頭大馬，咁咪乜都大囉，撚細嘅小朋友，學誠哥話齏，”量力而為”啦。
所有人種，都有正嘢同粗嘢，一般黎講有雪落嘅國家啲女皮膚較滑，世世代代落黎汗都流少啲，毛孔細，皮膚咪滑，所以北姑咁正。
眼前呢個係極品，髮金而長直，藍眼仲係淺藍嗰隻，一層薄薄汗毛响白裏透紅嘅皮膚上，令我諗起的又甜又多汁嘅白肉桃，仲有一樣係上品純種嘢嘅標記，金色眼眉毛，色水淺到差唔多睇唔到咁透明，咁，下面係點，行家嘅就唔使我再多講啦。
佢哋叫咗就走去搵位，我本來淨飲嘅，改為同佢哋食同樣，有時想埋人哋堆，就要同人做埋同樣嘢，先黎啲共通點咪易開波囉。
到我揸著嘢食四圍搵位（同搵佢哋時），如果呢套係王晶嘅戲，就會「咁啱」隔黎有張空枱，可惜唔係。
撞啱放學，呢度爆撚到七彩，啲o靚妹好撚醒目，一個搵位霸著，一個攞嘢食，我就企撚咗响度。
就响我好撚瘀時，鬼妹攞開霸位書包，
”Hey，you wanna seat here？”
Racheal 就唔多開心望著佢，鬼妹就細細聲答，
”He did bought our food."
我一路坐一路講，
”唔該，又會咁多人，咁迫，好彩你哋响度。”
鬼妹望著Racheal，
”What is he saying?”，
Racheal 答，
”He just saying he's thank you, that's all."
鬼妹笑望番我，
”Oh，you're welcome."
跟著就再望Racheal ，
”Who is this guy anyway,and does he understand English？”
Racheal 就答，”I think he's like my stepmom's boyfriend or something , and nah I don't think he understand English , watch this。"
到依家Racheal先「正式」開口同我講嘢，
”Ah，Mr, are you my yi yi's (Racheal 叫佢大肚妹做姨姨）boyfrined or something？”
我只係望著Racheal 微笑，跟著佢又再問，
”What were you guys doing over there in the lift when the power went out the other day?"
我仍然都係向著佢哋....微笑。
Racheal 望番鬼妹講，
”See , told you he doesn't understand English."
鬼妹就話，”Cool，at least he doesn't understands what we talk about, so what were you asking him about power went out in the lift?"
Racheal 開始笑，”oh，it was like so fucking funny，I was like going home then I ran into my stepmom and him together, while we were ridding the lift, the fucking power went out, and it was like pitch dark inside, next thing I heard this guy was like fooling around with my stepmom, isn't that fuck up?"
鬼妹聽到眼大口大，好似見到大撚嘅高興樣。
而我？依然保持微笑，你估我真係唔識英文咩，亞叔响溫哥華泡緊洋妞時你仲係條精蟲咋，我由第一次見到Racheal時，已保留我識英文，唔信大家留意返，就係等有朝一日好似依家咁。
呢啲咪叫老練囉，無知妹。
A....a....a....屌，咪著，佢話乜話？
佢原來係聽到我同大肚妹响度搞嘢？Shit！
老練與無知好似要掉反轉添。
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馬如雲響「新人類」學生妹面前「良」到爆嘅一集.....哈哈，好戲仲在後頭，睇o下邊個笑最尾啦。
仲有，嚟緊呢兩集，差唔多完全係鬼妹仔同竹升妹對話，所以為求「原汁原味」，將會用番英文寫出（出原文期間曾問讀友意見，大至都認為用番英文合適），不便之處，sorry la。咪當睇老番4仔囉。
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